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 |  A running blog on a real newbies adventures with the WDC website |
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I became a newbie writer just starting to learn the tools of the trade. Silly me thinking, I could just jump right in, and start swimming, with what I remember of my six grade English. After all what use did a professional computer repair person need of grammar, to fill in blanks, dot “I’s”, or cross his “T’s” with. I was forced into early retirement. Because of Agent Orange encounters from Vietnam, and a bad hernia repair. You cannot learn anything being a mugwump. What is a mugwump you say? It is a person sitting on a fence; with their mug on one side of the fence, and their wump on the other side. One day I received this interesting email from the Newbie Academy Group. They recommend I engage in contest activities. I thought to myself why not! I went to the contest list and found the writer’s cramp contest. At the prompt: here's a new restaurant in town with an interesting theme. What's the theme, how is it expressed, and how's the food? I read this and get all excited. I started thinking of all the Chief Gordon Ramsey shows I had watch with my wife. Out of nowhere pops a memory of a silly menu I had in my funny joke collection. It was a road kill menu for Uncle Roberts fine cuisine dinning. I decided to use my hillbilly name. I and my wife had a moment in our newly married life, when we were teasing a neighbor friend. We started calling our redneck friend Deny-Bob. He called us JoVonna-Bob and Brett-Bob. I decided to call my contest entry “Brett-Bob’s Road Kill Express” to me the whole idea was a joke and after all what a great thing to write about. To me the trick was to keep it rated ‘E’ as this was a requirement of the contest. I had in my mind decided to keep it as a fake road kill diner they would serve real food as fake road kill using the out of season as the excuse to use their specialty dishes for them. When I wrote it as with all my writing I am becoming world famous for run-ons and miss spelling. Part of the problem is MSoffice I blame its terrible spell checker, and the horrible grammar checker, since it cannot even do second grade error correction. Like I told one of the Newbie Academy Ladies I’m a senior citizen writing as a first grader. And even a first grader has trouble reading my work let alone the poor teacher. Beside whom else can I blame? None of us want to point that finger at ourselves. We might get ashamed and do something about it. One of the funnier parts to my story is I didn’t read it had a thousand word limit. I just assumed that they wanted whatever you could produce in a short time. Just like Nanowrimo. It had a twenty four hour dead line. I figured you didn’t need to worry, if it was a rough draft, or a finished work. This was probably my misreading of the contest rules. I’m betting the judge expects to judge finished works by more experienced authors other than newbies. Basically I’m trying to say, I set myself up for failure. But the best part of the story, and funniest is the judge’s comment: “You met that goal with an interesting piece. However, since I'm a vegetarian, it was unhappily a bit unappetizing in both humor and description. Sigh.” I know I thrive on rejection. But my very first contest. When I am trying to fit in, and receive that comment. It was about the funniest thing to happen to me. Being a new writer I understand not everything I write is golden or is going to make me incredibly rich either. I did install the sense of shame. I went visiting my email and asked the kind judge for help with run-ons. She took pity on me and provided a link to myenglishteacher.net. She also recommended a class from WDC’s own recommended school. She also recommended asking for help in my groups forums. The truth is I really don’t see even the kindest writer here, having the time to teach me sixth grade again. Then I realized I don’t need the whole lessen. I just need to learn to recognize what I do in my writing, and fix that issue. As I write I can auto correct instead or totally relearning English. So I went to some of the forums in the Newbie Academy Group. Since I have no life anymore I sometimes expect the same of everyone else. But the sad truth is it’s the week end, and all the nice people are out being nice people. I am going to have to wait until Monday to get my help. My contest entry received eight reviews; of the eight, two actually showed me areas to improve it, and of course one judge’s review. I think the poor lady felt sorry for me and I got the newbie prize of 250 gp with the review or it won third place. I in my vanity like the third place idea; the truth is I’m just guessing. I hope I haven’t offended any one with this story. It is another attempt at a funny story. I don’t have any hard feelings with the judge she was honest, truthful, and even extremely helpful. Some points of interest; only one person didn’t find it funny, the judge. Only the judge and one retired teacher gave me a link. They both gave me really helpful reviews with writing style help. I am still holding on to three reviews of the eight. I still get a laugh every time I read the third email. I just love her closing line: This story is fun, and I still have a silly smirk on my face. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** I'm building at "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise"  Great place to read.I'm docked at "Blog Harbor from The Talent Pond"
, a safe port for bloggers to connect. |
| Prompt: Pretend you were on the Mayflower on that first voyage to settle in America. Describe how your felt leaving England and seeing your new home. All I can think of, is how free I feel being out from under King George's oppression. No more will I have to bow and prance at court just to keep my family alive. No more will I have to agree on who should be thrown in the dungeons or paupers prison. Who the daily execution victim would be. I lost my favor for violence watching you publicly hang my best friend and his whole family just because he farted when he bowed to you. A pox on you, King George and all your descendants May they never live past the age of ten for my only son you hanged because he came to tell me Martha was sick. If we can find the freedom here I intend to fight for my rights to be free from your chains of servitude and of your corrupt power you use at a whim. I hope to come back as one of the ones who will show you the French form of capitol punishment and take your head and mount it on a pike for all to see your bloody rain is over. |
| Prompt: Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things. Take this and apply it to your blog in any way you see fit. First off I don't sweat the petty things like is there enough milk for my cheerios. Or if there is a wife hair on the bathroom sink. Or is the toilet seat up or down. Actually mine is permanently in the up position. Because of a handicap booster chair. She likes the chair just as much as I do. That ended the great toilet seat war in our house. I used to care how the tooth paste tube was squeezed or rolled up now it really doesn't matter as long as it gets used up. Now as for petting sweaty things like animals I agree in the case of a hard ridden horse you have brushes and combs to use to get the froth and sweat off so you can pet it. But sweaty things like your wife or children I leave that up to you. I feel like a no comment on that one. Because no mother or father is going to ignore their children. no matter what condition they are in. An what goes on between husband and wife should stay between them. |
| I just got back from the Hospital. I had bad swelling and lungs full of fluids. I had my wife's laptop but I just didn't have much energy until now. I did how ever figure out the story line for my eighth book and the way to assemble and tie up all eight books into the ninth. Now that I have that done. I need to go back and do the rough drafts on books three through eight. Now I need to play catch up on my grammar course and I'll be good to go. |
| Prompt: Have you ever heard a news item or fun factoid that you thought couldn't possibly be true. For example: "No black actress has been nominated for a Leading Actress in a Drama Series Primetime Emmy in 18 years. That's nearly two decades" I thought to myself, this cannot be true. Blog about any or all of this. Bonus Question: What do you think about creating either a group or a forum in which prompt bloggers and non-prompt bloggers posted together to increase readership and post variety? It looks like your trying to start a racist war. 18 years is a long time and thus it sure does point to that fact. There could be other deciding factors as well. One - not many Blacks watch Soaps anymore to vote for them. Two - the ones they have are not as good as the leading ladies. Three - they are cast in support roles and never get a chance to out shine the leading ladies. No matter the reason it looks like small minds still filled with hate in high places are controlling our soaps. The Bonus Question answer: Well If it had a funny host, great prompts, friendly people, Wow that sounds like Blog City or Blogging Circle of Friends. Is the forum for those who cannot blog? The interesting point I want to bring to the table. Much as I enjoy blogging I find it more of a writing exercise. Also I tend to get personal in my writing of them. Granted for those who don't have the accounts that support blogging I can see a forum. But I want to keep my personal information in one book that I control. That is why I blog instead of chat forums. If I want to stop the sharing I can make it private. I don't get the option in a forum plus like poor Charlie he got his rating changed or a language rant. what rating will the forum be? I'll bet you have to keep it PG-13 or lower like G lol. You would probably spend more time removing all the x rated rants then you ever did writing Blog prompts. Remember the Marines invented cussing as a way to confuse the enemy if you use the f-bomb every other word then no one understands what your saying but another marine. And people wonder why military intelligence is an oxymoron. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** The Run-on King PDG Member ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| I have had a few major computer problems. The Momma cat chewed through my internet cable. as part of the fix I completely re-installed windows so I'm still trying to get stuff to work. So bear with me I will be on and off a lot as I restore the books and writing tools back on the machine. Glad I backed it all up, but manually so I have to re-install manually one program at a time. |
| Today the actor/comedian Robin Williams passed away. What are your feelings about his work? How deeply are you affected by a celebrity death? Is there a particular celebrity whose passing would/has cause(d) significant grief? If this prompt too depressing for you, tell me about your favorite celebrity, dead or alive. You know I have two mottos about death that I live by: 1). It is a good day to die (Dustin Holfman from the movie "Little Big Man.) 2). We start dying the day we are born so death is going to happen and there is nothing that can stop it. I am a great fan of Robin Williams work. He has always brighten my day when I see one of his movies. or some of his stand up work. My love of the man started with "Good Morning Vietnam." And progressed to seeing all his movies and stand up. He was always funny and had a great sense of humor. I am sad that life forced him to pass on before his time, but I cannot morn him very much since I never knew the man just the comedian. He has left quite a legacy behind. He will be remembered. Just like other men who showed us the different takes on life like Red Skeleton, John Belushi, just to mention a few. Robin Williams will be missed but not forgotten. |
| Tell me about RAGE: Yours, someone else's, the concept of, or any interpretation of this that rocks your socks. Talk about rage I really would be raging if some idiot put rocks in my socks. Granted they are not the most expensive on the market but they are doctor proscribed and help reduce the swelling in my legs and feet so they are not cheep either. The idea of rocks in my socks is about as horrible as a cut off human head rolling down a set of stairs spilling fresh blood all over. My view on rage is it helps us over come things but the show of it makes us all look like a two year old throwing a temper tantrum. On a much happier note see "Invalid Entry" if you want a good chuckle. |
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** I just wanted to share some morning humor with you all. |
| If you were trapped in an elevator for 12 hours, which three bloggers would you most want with you in that situation? Keep in mind 12 hours is a long time.... Ok first I would pick Lyn, Mitch, and Charlie. Next I would spot the emergency exit on the roof, and boost Charlie up there to open it up, and escape out for help. If the other two want out as well I would boost them up there as well. I'm six foot two, I weigh too much for the three of them to even think about pulling me out. As long as they got me a book or two to read and food and a drink. I can last twelve hours no problem, but they can go be with their families and we can all stay friends. Besides knowing Charlie he would sit up there and crack jokes until they rescued me. And probably have Mitch feeding him new material as well. Lyn would probably go home and keep tabs on us with her cell phone because she does worry about her friends. |
| Which door will you open? Narnia, Hogwarts, Wonderland, Camelot, Neverland, Middle Earth or Westeros (Lord Of The Rings Geography area) Dang the choices are so wonderful I just love to explore. I have read and seen movies on Narnia. I have both the books and the movies for Harry Potter. I love the old books plus some of the newer version of wonderland as well as the once upon a time series. I have the all books about Middle Earth plus have read them all a few times and I own all the movies made of it. I own "Hook, Return to Neverland plus I watch the series Once Upon A Time in Story Book Land" as well. Now Westeros sounds interesting never been there I think. I think it would be great to camp out there. But I will bring along my personal all terrain vehicle (Tank). After all who knows what kind of mythical creature will come visiting in an unfriendly way! |
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