The Top Ten List

"#3 Gene has to die someday. Politics is the only profession where retirement age means NOTHING. Oh, and maybe the ministry."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#2 "Thought that freakin' saga would NEVER end." Talking of which ... ?"

-- deemac

"#1 Can't we just shoot them all and start over?"

-- Grandma Penguin needs help

"The Top Ten Ways to Pass the Time while waiting for someone to post a topic for the next Top Ten List"

-- deemac

"#10 Experiment with WritingML."

-- deemac

"#9 Watch our fingernails grow"

-- Dad

"#8 Wonder why my new costumicon makes me feel like Batman's archnemesis The Riddler. (Thanks, catty!)"

-- Dad

"#7 Wonders why Dad doesn't visit the costumicon page and get himself a costumicon that doesn't broadcast "I don't know how to change my costumicon!" to the whole world."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#6 Sits and wonders if Dad and Steve are as crazy in real life as they portray themselves online. Then goes out for a smoke."

-- Grandma Penguin needs help

"#5 Sit and try to decide if Pengy likes her tobacco regular, menthol, or wacky"

-- Dad

"#4 Try to figure out where the costumicon page is "

-- Dad

"#3 Wonders if anyone helpful will email costumicon changing instructions to Dad."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#2 Thinks, Heck, nobody's posted a new topic yet, let him steam for a while. "

-- deemac

"#1 Suddenly get an awesome exciting for a new list ... then your connection goes down and by the time you're back online you've forgotten your so you just post another lame topic instead ..."

-- deemac

"#10 Top Ten Costumicons to give Dad for Christmas"

-- deemac

"#10 A Toulouse-lautrec broad dancing the can-can "

-- deemac

"#9 It's too bad there isn't a blank costumicon. That would be perfect for him."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"OT That should actually read: "#10 A Toulouse-lautrec fat broad dancing the can-can ""

-- Dad

"#8 A costumicon with lots of children on it because I have only one."

-- Dad

"#7 A picture of catty. She bought it for me."

-- Dad

"#6 Penguins, cuz he wants to be like me!"

-- Grandma Penguin needs help

"#5 Turnips, because you waited too long to shop and got stuck with the last available costumicon."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#4 One with lots of pairs of red, green and purple striped, polkadot socks on it to remind him of what his dear old departed Great Aunt Matilda used to give him every year."

-- deemac

"#3 One with 10,000 ties. Everybody knows that the best gift to give a dad is another tie, which is just what every dad wants."

-- Dad

"Top Ten Reasons I Hadn't Reviewed This Before"

-- Dad

"OT: Ignore the post titled "Top Ten Reasons I Hadn't Reviewed This Before" It doesn't belong here."

-- Dad

"#2 A costumicon labeled with the numbers from 10 to 1 would come in handy for him."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#1 One with a picture of Mom on it, of course."

-- Grandma Penguin needs help

"Top Ten Presents Ms Penguin Will Get For Christmas"

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#10 Fish. Duh!"

-- Dad

"#9 That super comfortable bra they keep advertising on late night infomercials that I watch with fascination."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#8 Something to put into the bra (Oh, Dad, you are wicked tonight)"

-- Dad

"#7 A harem of hot men with lots of stamina. Please? (I have plenty to put in it, Dad. But, I heard those bras don't work well for larger busted women)"

-- Grandma Penguin needs help

"#6 (Tell that to the bra models they are using. They ain't skinny!) ... Pearls. Don't get excited. You aren't really getting any pearls, but I thought one out of the10 gifts should be something nice, or at least something that you can pawn for cash."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#5 Cash (Notice how I never said I'd be giving her cash. Just that she might possibly kinda could be maybe pretty please with sugar on it maybe might get)"

-- Dad

"#4 A life-size 'The Penguin' action figure from the Batman series - with kung-fu grip and a removable, vibrating umbrella. "

-- Captain Pancake

"#3 A life-size vibrating umberlla."

-- Dad

"#2 A case of vodka, a case of tequila, a case of diet coke and a bag of limes!"

-- Grandma Penguin needs help

"#1 A little memory book to remind her of her name and address and any other details of her life that she might lose as all her brain cells are gradually consumed by alcohol."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"Top Ten Midwinter Vacation Trips You Would Be Glad To Win On A Game Show"

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#10 Florida. "

-- Dad

"#9 You know that "Atlantis" place they keep advertising on cable with the dolphins and the special deals and the clear blue Caribbean waters and especially that chick in the bikini at the end of the ad?"

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#8 Nassau in the Bahamas. Went there when I was 8,. Loved it!!!"

-- Grandma Penguin needs help

"#7 St. Thomas, Ste. Maarten, St. Croix, St. John, St. Vincent, but not the Grenadines"

-- Dad

"#6 Costa Rica with a side trip to Jurrassic Park."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#5 Any place that does not include the phrase "State Prison," "Federal Correctional Institution," or "Work Camp" in its title."

-- Dad

"#3 A vacation on TopTenList Island - unvisited by any other human being throughout the entire winter months"

-- deemac

"#2 A one-way ticket to Spring."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#1 an all-Expense paid trip to the Top Ten List I/O"

-- Dad

"Top Ten Successful Lines to Try to Get Catty into the Sack"

-- Dad

"#10 Here, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty...."

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#9 Your place?: My place? Maybe the bar restroom?"

-- Dad

"#8 Oh, I almost forgot, I've got something for you."

-- Eli VanDyne

"#7 Get in this sack right now!"

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#5 Hey catty! Wanna see something you've never seen before?"

-- Dad

"#4 Respect you in the morning? Hell's bells, I don't respect you NOW!"

-- Dad

"#3 hey, catty! Do you wanna...>>> ,,,, >>>.... How'd you get naked and ?into bed that quick"

-- Dad

"#2 Hey, catty! Have you ever heard of that game that involves a long stick, balls, and a hole? (I AM, of course, referring to gold (or billiards))"

-- Dad

"OT: I meant, of course, golf, not gold. !#@$*()@},/{)@ tyops"

-- Dad

"#1 Hey catty - Can I stick my finger in your belly button. Whaddya mean that ain't you bellybutton? The joke's on you, honey! That ain't my finger!"

-- Dad

"Top 10 Things Dad and Steve Would Never Ever Ever say to Each Other"

-- Dad

"#10 Wanna play some golf?"

-- Dad

"#9 Okay, but only if deemac caddies for us. Let's face it, that guy's one-liners just beat the heck out of our stuff any day."

-- deemac

"#8 Well, OK, but bowling is definitely out. Bowling it waaaaaayyyyyyy to strenuous for us young fellers."

-- Dad

"#7 Dad would never ever say to Steev the Friction Wizurd (and vice-versa) "I'm no longer going to be ornery. Want to join me in this personality change?" (unless, of course, it was said tongue-in-cheek)."

-- AJ wants U 2 meet The CanMan!

"#6 Hey Dad! Wanna stick your tongue in my cheek? "

-- Dad

"#5 Let's be nice to people for a week. OK, how about 5 days then?"

-- Steev the Friction Wizurd

"#4 If Steev would just go away for, oh, let's say, maybe 6 months, I still wouldn't miss him. (OT: Hate to admit it, but it's been nearly 6 months, and I do miss him.) "

-- Dad

"The Top Ten reasons why Scott Joseph (creator of this in&out) dropped off the site 20 years ago and has just now reappeared reincarnated as OldGuyThinker?"

-- OldGuyThinker

"#10 Witness protection program"

-- OldGuyThinker

"#9 Botched mission impossible mission that he stupidly chose to accept"

-- OldGuyThinker

"#8 Missed Deemac and Penguin and Dad and many others but has difficulty with online writing relationships"

-- OldGuyThinker

"#7 Life happened, my old email went defunct, couldn't get in under old account, created new one - realized i was now old but out of witness protection and re avowed by the IMF so I'm back baby!"

-- OldGuyThinker

"#6 Would have rejoined in 2016 but realized Donald Trump was now president so I went into a catatonic state for over 4 years....is it over yet?"

-- OldGuyThinker

"#5 The Storymaster finally lifted the restraining order."

-- Dad